Just… Really.

I know my first post dealt with fat people being bullied. I promise this blog won’t be solely about that but, I just need to say this.

Person: “I don’t know how you walk in those things.”
Me: “Very carefully.”
Person: “Yes! I hope your ankles can carry all that weight.”

I was on my way to lunch when someone said that. My BLT didn’t taste very good – and we are talking bacon makes everything better.

I cried. My friends on Facebook provided encouragement and good counsel.

I prayed a lot this afternoon and finally got up the nerve to email the person to ask if we may speak privately (I went to the office but they were with someone) about what was said in accordance with Matthew 18:15. They may not have seen they email yet. Or they may claim that they did not receive it. So here is what I’ve been thinking and praying that I will say:

When I was on my way to lunch, I heard you say something and I could not believe it. I heard you say ‘I hope your ankles can carry all of that weight.’ What was supposed to be a fun, light-hearted day was nearly ruined by your careless words. You turned creativity into a fat joke. It was mean and uncalled for.

As a fellow believer and your sister in Christ, I feel compelled to draw this to your attention so that you can take this to our Lord in prayer and rest in His teachings. I would like to encourage you to spend some time meditating on I Thessalonians 5, where Paul encourages believers to build each other up or Hebrews 10 where we spur one another on in love.

Bully for You, Interwebs!

I think I have 382,024,205,523 things to say about the story of the News Anchor v. Internet Tough Guy. Too many that I can’t focus on just one thing so it might turn into a series of things. Poor Elena. She gets to hear me yell and kvetch before I write it down. She’s just generally awesome. Onto the point…

Having been the victim of my own Internet Tough Guy several years ago (see my response here all of which had to do with this video that was linked on the old Nashville is Talking blog), the dust up is rather personal to me.

Especially since Internet Tough Guy issued a statement offering to “help” the Newscaster become a better role model by taking the next year to lose a significant amount of weight. I am not sure if that angered me more than his original email.

Sure – ITG maybe thought he was saying something helpful. My grandpa did when he would poke me in the stomach or arm and call me “chubby” – that the insult would motivate me to stop eating junk food. The reverse happened – because I felt bad about myself and didn’t measure up and didn’t feel loved by my own family, I would eat more because the food wasn’t judgmental. The endorphin rush made me feel good for a while (sound like an addict?)

When you put yourself in the public eye for whatever reason – by profession, blogging, or just going to Wal-Mart, you leave yourself open to positive as well as negative criticism. The anchors knew that. I didn’t think in 2007 when I uploaded my video that I would be called a “blogging whale” by some dude in Memphis because I didn’t see myself that way and wanted to share what was so much fun for me with others.

The truth is: words hurt. And with the advent of relatively anonymous communication online, mean things get said far more often than ever would have face to face. Now that I’ve wandered back into the virtual fray, I’m sure it will happen again. Haters gonna hate. Fatties be fat. There I said it for you, future jerk. Save the bandwidth because I don’t want to hear you opine on how I disgust you. Well, you disgust me so it’s mutual. I don’t care if you wouldn’t sleep with me because… HEY! I wouldn’t want to sleep with you either even if it meant saving humanity from extinction, and I’m kinda OK with that.

Also, the reason why your comment may or may not be approved is that I’m trying to… protect you from yourself. Push your luck and I might not be so forgiving (sorta said Darth Vader.)

Sorry. Got sidetracked.

This response from the Fat Nutritionist is NSFW but raises important issues on “helpful” comments that do far more damage.

But, to the Ms. Livingston’s response (which was beautiful and classy – highlighting bigger issues than just one email from random guy… that this is a cultural problem) and anything else we may come across, one has to ask “what is the wise thing to do?” My knee jerk reaction is to pummel these ITG’s with all verbal barrels blazing. Or to beat them with my bag if confronted in person. While I may feel better, they aren’t exactly “wise.”

I do think that we must confront the bullies because they need to know that they are “sad little kings of sad little hills.” It may not change their mind or opinion, but maybe they will think twice before pulling the proverbial trigger on the next person they encounter. And you will feel better for being better than them.

An intergalactic junk drawer?

I’ve been blogging on and off for I think nearly or over a decade now. My other blog is dedicated to my spiritual walk. Somehow, I just didn’t think it appropriate to put up my love of science fiction, forays into politics, or squeeing about LOLcats in the midst of a devotional on Matthew (that is when I do post them.)

So, welcome to the junk drawer.